The Power of Grace

A journey of recovery from years of sustained child sexual abuse within the church

Michelle Hood is a woman now. But at the age of nine and as a member of a loving Adventist family from a farming community in Western Australia, Michelle was being groomed by a prolific predator within the Church.
This man was also a family friend and taught many children in Sabbath school.
As a well respected Church elder and lay preacher he was considered a pillar of not only the Church but the local community at large.
Michelle was one of five children, two of whom were adopted at birth.
Both the adopted children were girls and had a beautiful family life to sustain them for what should have been a bright Christian future.
Michelle’s adoption was a weapon this man used to secure her silence for so many years. He would promote the notion that if she told her adopted parents that she would not be believed and be sent back to the orphanage.
But this “pillar of the community” had other plans for this family that would affect their entire future.
The gruesome facts surrounding this set of incidents are public knowledge, because Michelle and another brave woman [also a victim of this same man] pressed charges against him in Western Australia in 1998.
This led to a much publicized case that proceeded to the District Court of Perth over a period of three years.
The defendant was charged with numerous offences and was indicted to stand trial in the District Court.
These court hearings became a debacle with the accused man presenting with alleged illnesses ultimately leading to the W.A. Department of Public Prosecutions shelving the case based on mounting costs.
It was the belief of the D.P.P. based on the testimony of a reporting doctor that the accused was too old and too ill to stand further trial and was not expected to live more than two years.
This was nine years ago and the defendant  still lives a healthy active life, for a man of his years.
That the D.P.P. should have such considerations for a man of his age when the shattered lives of not only the child victims but so many others connected to them begs logical understanding.
Sadly this lack of understanding and duty of care presents to the Church and its governing body for several reasons as well.
At the time of these revelations, many within the Church and particularly its hierarchy, including Pastors, tried to push these allegations under the carpet.
This was common of the times not only in the Adventist Church but all other religious denominations as has been faithfully reported in the media in recent years.
The ramifications of these actions for the victims however, was to be catastrophic.
Some in the Church victimized the girls and their families for bringing charges and the Church offered no support to any of the victims either then or since.
Michelle’s abuse lasted from age nine to age fifteen during which time she was repeatedly raped and abused on many occasions both on church property, under the guise of Sabbath school lessons, and elsewhere.
Her feelings towards the Church, and indeed religion, was until now severely tainted.
Michelle was quick to add, that as a child it was difficult to see past the people and their judgmental views to be able to visualize Jesus Christ.
This understandably led to her disillusionment.
I have long held the view that I believe in God but not in religion. I have held strongly to the opinion that religion is the business of God, conducted by men, and they do it very badly.
Having stated these views and lived through the torment and public humiliation of hundreds of hours of testimony to the police and the courts it would be understandable that Michelle and other victims would be justifiably bitter.
This would obviously have an adverse effect on their lives and families.
Michelle however has been working hard to improve her quality of life.
She managed to camouflage her indignation by working relentlessly to achieve success in study.
She proudly holds three university degrees in Nursing, Psychology and Law.
All these talents, now very useful and indicative, that God may have a plan for her.
I came into Michelle’s life on August the sixth last year [2006] and we are to be married in 2008.
Our journey both as individuals and as a couple is viewed by many as remarkable.
I was a man confused about God and religion and Michelle had a strong belief in God but had lost faith in the Church.
We did not know it at the time but we were to lead each other by the power of, The Holy Spirit back to the Church for Michelle, and to God for me.
What was to keep me from religion for over fifty years was the experience that the most unchristian actions I had ever witnessed were conducted by people purporting to be Christians.
Mahatma Gandhi once said, “I like your Christ, I don’t like your Christians. Your Christians are not like your Christ.”
Most outside the Church would sadly agree with this.
Michelle admitted to me that she had unfinished business with the man who violated her over those dreadful years and to that end I promised to go with her to visit him so that she could speak frankly about the damage he had done.
The power of the Holy Spirit began to work within us both however because Michelle discovered that the only way forward in this situation was to forgive this man, and she did.
Our mission to visit him on the other side of the continent then became a pilgrimage  to tell him that she had forgiven him.
So over the Easter period of 2007 we made our way from Brisbane to Perth and then the drive of several hours over two days to the town where this man resides in a Nursing Home.
Along the way we visited the family farm where Michelle grew up and this was to be part of a journey of remembrance for her.
Some of the offences were actually committed on the farm where Michelle grew up.
When we visited the now mostly deserted property we wandered around the old homestead whose once glorious gardens were now a desert.
Amidst the dust was growing a very sad looking rose bush adorned with two glorious red roses.
We picked one of the blooms to take the rest of the way with us to represent the support of her now deceased Mother and Father.
We then proceeded via an overnight stop to find this man. Praying all the way for God’s help to both find him and choose the most profound words when we did.
As we eventually made our way into the nursing home complex we took one of 4 entrances into our destination.
This happened to be outside the administration building for the nursing home.
We paused in the car, prayed again, took a deep breath and then, with the rose in hand walked towards the building in the hope of finding this man.
As we approached the building Michelle paused and started to tremble.
Sitting alone on a park bench at the front of the building was an old respectable looking man.
She gripped my hand and said “that’s him”!
We could not believe our good fortune. As we approached I stood in front of the man and Michelle sat beside him.
He asked me to introduce myself, which I did and then I asked him if he knew the lady sitting next to him.
He replied no, so I introduced  her to him.
He was shocked to see her and appeared nervous.
He said that she looked different and asked how she was.
She then went on to say that she had travelled for several days across the continent to tell him that she had forgiven him.
He gripped her hand tightly and tears came to his eyes. What he said next was a dagger into her heart.
He said “That’s nice Michelle, thank you for that, and I want you to know that I forgive you too. You know as well as I do that you were just as responsible as I was”!
I must remind you here that Michelle was only a child at the time to which  he was referring.
We were staggered by his response and Michelle looked away and said loudly, “Oh God give me strength”!
I then gripped his shoulder firmly and said with some assertiveness, “That is not acceptable”.
He then looked at me fearfully and put his head in his hands and said, “I can’t talk about this, it’s all too hard”.
Michelle then took his hand and said, “All that aside I just want you to know that I forgive you”. She then leaned over, kissed him on the forehead, and walked away.
I stayed with him for a moment and he asked me to take care of her because she was special. I then bid him “you go in peace old fella” and walked away.
My initial thought was to verbally attack him in her defense.
I didn’t because I thought that if she had the courage to walk away, then who was I to judge him.
Michelle realized some months earlier that she could not expect God to forgive her sins if she couldn’t forgive others who sinned against her.
I then walked to Michelle who was sobbing profusely and we hugged and cried.
Within a minute of the conversation ending one of the mans relatives walked out of the building, led him to a waiting car, and he was driven away for Easter.
We  had made it to him by just three minutes.
As he drove away Michelle said “Look at that. Isn’t that the most beautiful rose you have ever seen”?
With that I looked into the garden near our car and there was the most magnificent bloom I had ever seen as if it were under a spotlight, a gift from God as a reward for the most courageous act of Grace I have ever witnessed.
I have never been as proud of a human being in my life as I was of her that day.
Any doubts I may have had as to the power of the Holy Spirit were banished from my thoughts from that moment and our lives have been a succession of miracles ever since.
I am now of the belief that the primary mission of the Church is to bring people to Christ.
We are constructing a table much like a family tree to illustrate the effects these predators have on this primary mission.
Already we can see a dramatic effect. If the predator is at the top of the tree and the victims are below and keep spreading, the loss of potential Christians is staggering.
Already in one generation we have been able to confirm that at least 22 people may well be lost to this Holiest of causes and that is just working with Michelle as the primary victim. There are many more.
These people, or a percentage of them, may have been saved by an educated and timely response from the Church.
When one considers the efforts and sacrifices made by the wonderful people who conduct mission work in the dangerous and in some cases, God forsaken parts of our planet, to save just a handful of people to Christ, it seems disgustingly wasteful to have so many lost in our own back yard.
The difficulty affecting many religions is the corporate nature of their structure.
The gathering of the world’s people under the banner of any particular religion requires that religion to offer a place in which to worship.
This requires property and property requires money and money then requires management.
Management requires people who often have agendas of their own which may not be that of Our Lord Jesus Christ.
Ego’s now play a major part which perpetuates politics and before we know it, the main purpose of the Church to begin with, is lost and so are the people who matter the most.
With the issue of sexual abuse within the Church there will be some who say that to offer support and apologize to these victims may leave the organization liable.
To this end, they may add, we must protect the organization at the expense of the people including the victims.
How is this different to the situation that led Jesus to cast out the money lenders from the Temple of His Father?
Do we not have a similar situation if this is the case?
So to those who think this way and those who believe that this open transparency will damage the Church I ask you to consider this.
When it comes to abusers like this in the Church, and,  you know these sins have taken place, then if you are not part of the solution, you are definitely part of the problem.
By not helping the victims and hiding your head in the sand you are giving tacit support to these monsters.
I say this to you as well. If I was the Devil and I was locked in combat with God then I would put my very best knights in the front line.
To me the frontline is the House of God and the ranks of God’s Christian followers.
To my way of thinking then we must accept that there will always be disciples of Satan lurking in our midst.
The scriptures tell us that when ever two or  more are gathered in His name then He will be there.
What better place to infiltrate and divert the cause of Christianity than in the very Churches themselves.
If a Church is a hospital for sinners and not a museum for Saints then we must face the fact that some within the Church are the Golden Staph which hospitals must eradicate.
This obviously poses the dilemma that some of these predators need to repent and repent now.
Of course if this is there purpose then they should not be denied this right because Jesus Christ is the ultimate Judge and not us.
We must still be aware of this situation and be on our guards.
The children of our congregations are as much our responsibility as they are that of their parents.
Having said all of this, we do acknowledge that the Church has implemented strategies to help prevent these occurrences by education in some form.
We are left to hope that strategies to deal with the needs of the victims of the future are also in place.
However it is our experience that the many victims of the past have had no such consideration and in some cases it would appear that the perpetrator of these ghastly crimes is given more consideration than are his victims. This is also sadly true of the legal system in this country.
Michelle has never been approached to this very day by anyone representing the hierarchy of the Adventist Church to offer any support, counseling or explanation as to its inability to protect its parishioners.
This is an indictment of the past structure of the Church and must be corrected as soon as is possible by thoughtful meaningful and sincere dialogue and offers of support commensurate with the horrific nature of the crimes committed.
This level of support is extensively available to victims within other denominations such as the Baptist Church.
This brave approach may well indicate the reasons for the rapid growth of the Baptist Church in our society.
The Adventist movement needs to take note of these initiatives and start setting some positive and thoughtful agendas of its own.
To this end Michelle and I are committed to be part of the solution.
We are proposing that we, and Michelle in particular ,are presented to the annual conferences of Pastors held in each state to outline our thoughts, and offer our suggestions.
We are already in the planning stages of setting up a property at our own expense which will be located in Queensland.
This property we hope to name “Serenity” and we would like to make it available as a retreat for victims where they might be able to avail themselves of counseling, support and peer group understanding from both ourselves and our committed supporters.
We envisage that this retreat may last for approximately seven days and will take place several times a year and will always be followed up with ongoing pastoral care in what ever form required.
We undertake to do this at our own expense and through the support of a foundation we hope to set up in the future.
To this end we need the support of this Church and its leadership.
Jesus requires that men of real stature stand up and come forward in His Holy name.
I implore the readers of this article to go back to the basics of the teachings of Jesus Christ and put his Holy purpose first in their thoughts.
I feel confident that there does exist in this Church enough people of good heart and commitment to bring about a valid and noticeable change in Church policy.
There is no time left to delay this important work.
The scope of the victims goes well beyond those initially involved as we have discovered.
The periphery of the ripples caused in this pond is too wide spread to determine.
We propose that our retreat will also welcome the victim’s families who may well have much healing to do and much more to contribute.
We are also willing to travel to other states and both hold these retreats and assist others in the work required to set them up.
There is much scope for, and great need of, this work to be done and we are astounded by the level of support and commitment to change we have already witnessed.
May God be with us all in this agenda and may He give us all the courage and conviction to lead the way as the head of the horse rather than its tail.
Michelle’s demonstration of Grace is nothing when compared to that shown us by Jesus Christ on the Cross.
We know that in his absence we are the light to others for him. Lets be a lighthouse for all and not just a spotlight for the righteous.
God Bless you all

Michelle and Graham Hood.

We may be contacted on,
Phone. 07 55022221
Michelle’s mobile 0439 969597
Graham’s mobile 0409 416 737
Fax  07 55022220
Michelle’s email  mm1409@internetexpress.net.au
Graham’s email  graham.hood@bigpond.com